My Spiritual Journey
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By Anne Donegan Costas 
What has your spiritual journey been like? Where have you been? Where are you headed? For me my spiritual journey has had ups and downs to say the least. There were some times I was in the desert and other times I touched God. As I look back on my life I am sad to say there were times I didn’t listen much to God. I was thinking of myself and what fun I could have!
Where It All Began
As children my parents took us to church and Sunday school faithfully. Both of my parents taught for years. I remember beginning to have a vague understanding of God. I joined the church when I became of age and went to Saturday classes like so many of you. Those helped strengthen my journey and give me a bit more information. When I was about 13 years old is when I started a true prayer life. We lived in a secluded place with no neighbors. There were fields all around with cows and other wildlife. I would frequently walk down the road and talk with God. I did some mooing with the cows too. These are special memories for me and it was one place I could be alone with God. (I grew up with 3 siblings so it wasn’t quiet much) I remember having a daily prayer booklet from the church we attended and I would read it daily. I tore out favorite scriptures that were special to me or a story I could relate to. My parents were often wondering why I seemed so much more religious. I remember them asking me when I was younger what made me more prayerful than my siblings? I didn’t know. I was 14-15 then. I still don’t know. We were all introduced to church and Sunday school the same. I am sure our experiences were different because each of us are different and will respond in different ways.
The Quiet Years
I call these the quiet years because even though my college roommate and I attended church somewhat regularly I didn’t feel that I was following God as closely as I do now or did before. Compared to others in college I may have been further along in my spiritual walk, but I was certainly not growing during this time. I took a Bible class my 3rd year and enjoyed it a lot. It was a small class which was nice because you could ask questions and have good discussions. (although I don’t remember any discussions–I am assuming we had them?) By the time I graduated from college I was married and beginning another part of my journey. My prayer/spiritual journey took quite a turn. A good turn!
Early Years
My husband and I joined a church and went faithfully. We sort of met in “the middle”. By that I mean I was raised Methodist and he was raised (Greek) Orthodox. So we went to the Episcopal church. I really liked it. I liked the liturgy, the prayers. I felt like it was more interactive and it seemed more reverent to me. Remember I was newly married and 21-22 years old. I especially liked kneeling when we prayed. We moved after college to Houston and found an Episcopal church we both liked. I joined the Episcopal church at that point. We participated in church and some of the activities. I did attend a women’s book study group for a while. Being young and busy with our new jobs we didn’t have much energy during the week. So we stuck pretty much to Sunday worship. But we thoroughly enjoyed the teaching lessons/sermons. The priest gave great sermons. So continued my journey. I feel after I married my journey took a significant turn. I have always enjoyed reading spiritual books and read some during these early years of my married life.
Later
When we changed cities once more and started having children my spiritual life really started taking off. We joined a congregation with a lot of young families. My husband and our children attended most church events from picnics, parish family retreats, women’s groups (me) and more. The next 30 years really shaped me into who I am today. I will share those years another time. It has been an exciting time. Times that I have cried, loved, laughed, touched the hand of God, and felt so alone I thought I couldn’t find God. Do you ever feel alone? One last thing I will share is that I have learned when I feel alone or feel that I cannot find God–it is me! God has never left me and tells me in the Bible he will never leave me. So I have learned I am the one who doesn’t extend my hand to his. I hope that might help you next time you feel alone. Remember to put your hand out there. You will find God’s hand waiting for you.
(The picture above is from a friend. It looks like God’s hands in the clouds. It is one of my favorite’s)
Peace~